Love Dream

I woke up this morning from a dream. In the dream, the person I loved, loved me back. He confessed he loved me for years. I was so touched by my dream that I woke up thinking it was real. I got dressed thinking I was in love. I drove to work feeling in love. I carried on the rest of my day being in love. The sad reality of this is that I am not in love. I am not in love with anyone and no one loves me. I have come to realize that as I age, falling love has become more and more difficult. As much as I do not like to admit it but I am a hopeless romantic. I believe in love at first sight. I believe in simple love. I believe that love cannot be replaced with convenience, pure companionship, or money. If you do not love someone, do not be with them. If you love someone, love them unconditionally.

Balance

I left March 2^nd. It was 6 years of my twenties that I left. A commitment to an organization where I met great people and learned everything I know about business. That commitment was broken. The root cause: a negative force that entered my balanced life. This negative force caused me to have nightmares at night and caused great stress and unhappiness. I was struggling, struggling between logic and emotions. This person taught me so much that benefited my career and yet this person was so destructive to my balance and happiness. I could not get myself to hate this person because I felt I owed this person for the guidance and help I received. But on the other side, this person was so awful! So to save my sanity, I left the negative environment I was in. I miss the constant cash flow but I cannot say I regret it. I am at a better place.

I recently entered a new adventure in my career. The new adventure looks a little bit like this: milk, a smelly work environment, nice people, and that one thorn in the batch. I’m working on that thorn. I want to eventually overcome that thorn.

Foods prepared with vinegar or lemon juice have always been a favorite of mine. I stopped by a local Filipino restaurant last week and decided to grab Adobo. For those of you familiar with Filipino food, Adobo is a common dish prepared with either chicken or pork. Adobo actually refers to a cooking process in which the meat is stewed in vinegar - hence the direct translation of the word to English means pickled. Adobo is one of my favorites dishes but is also extremely fattening. Although I recommend learning to make the dish from scratch to reduce the fat intake, some restaurants that I would recommend for this include Nanay Gloria and Goldilocks. These restaurants are 'food-to-go-style' and are quite inexpensive (less than $10 per person).

Tip of the day: Vinegar has long been known to be a good natural cleaning agent and has also been known to help when applied on sunburns. Carry mini packs of vinegar if you want a quick and easy way to clean your forks and spoons at restaurants.

Inspirations for Life

In life, we each have our own paths to walk, obstacles to overcome, challenges to face. Our friends, our families, our mentors, or other people we meet in life usually give us advice, if not help guide us, along the way. I have never had a "mentor" in life primarily due to my poor abilities to keep in touch with past bosses, teachers, etc and quite possibly, there may be a part of me that does not feel the need to do so (shame on me!). Instead, I've found that I am better at finding what I call "quick inspiration": a character in a movie, a quote from a reading, a clip from a Youtube sensation. Recently, while randomly web surfing (and trying to find 5 minutes of escape from life's everyday stresses), I found a very inspiring clip on Youtube. I would like to introduce Queenie Chen. I feel she is a great inspiration for Chinese females all over the world. She has traveled the world, has a great passion for art and beauty, and is able to express herself confidently and successfully. Honestly, I would love to reach her level of accomplishment one day. So, without further adieu, please check her video out below. Maybe it will inspire you as it has me. We all have rough days (or months) but we must remember to find peace within and cherish what has already been given to us in life. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrSZesAff6E

Memories, Decisions & Past Events

Recently, I've been reflecting on past, present, and possibly future events in life. I find it amazing how certain things trigger memories, emotions, and so many feelings. A song can bring you back to 10 months ago when you met that someone who could've been a significant person in your life. A certain place can trigger negative feelings b/c once upon a time, you met up with someone there whom ultimately ended up being one of the scariest people in your life. A sad tragic movie moves you to tears b/c it brings back all the pain you felt when you went through the exact same thing the protagonist goes through. Memories. I feel my decisions sometimes are consciously and sub-consciously affected by past events. Is this wrong? I know some of you might think so. However, are you not guilty of the same sin?

I recently discovered an amazing artist on YouTube: Marie Digby. Here's some of the lyrics to her cover "Unfold". Can you relate to this? On many levels, I can.

what i can remember is alot like water trickling down a page of the most beautiful colors i can't quite put my finger down on the moment that i became like ... this

you see, i'm the bravest girl you will ever come to meet and yet i shrink down to nothing at the thought of someone really seeing me

i think my heart is wrapped around and tangled up in winding weeds but i don't wanna go on living being so afraid of showing someone else my.. imperfections

even though my feet are trembling and every word i say comes stumbling i will bare it all.. watch me unfold unfold

these hands that i hold behind my back are bound and broken by my own doing and i can't feel anything, anymore i need a touch to remind me i'm still real..

my soul it's dying to be free i can't live the rest of my life so guarded it's up to me to choose..what kind of life i lead. cause i don't wanna go on living being so afraid of showing someone else my.. imperfections

even though my feet are trembling and every word i say comes stumbling i will bare it all.. watch me unfold unfold

i will allow someone to love me

Home Coming

Yes, home coming is what this is I would say. Once upon a time, I once had a blog on Xanga. I wrote to my heart's content. But like every dream, it came to a close. Four years and countless wheat grass shots later, I am embarking on another writer's journey. I hope this one will last longer than the last. So to myself, I will say "welcome home"!